I am Scrooge. I am The Grinch. I HATE the Holidays. I don’t even like wrapping, giving, receiving gifts! All that trash! So what does my family do? They assigned my house as the holiday destination and it reigned for over 6 years! Now I only have December Holiday.

Over the years, it has grown on me. I have thankfully encouraged them to be mindful of the reason for the season - and encourage thoughtful gifts that are either charitable or very useful. I encourage conscientious packing, but my sister usually kicks me in the butt and tells me to “shut-up”!

All in all, I have finally turned myself around to at least be pleasantly grouchy.

I sing every tune on the “Grinch” cartoon, serve at community headstart programs and hug my dog to get into the spirit - BAH! {still loathe snow}

My favorite funny Christmas memory: When I was a kid, we lived overseas, and all Christmas presents from grandparents came in the mail, sometimes with the wrapping a little worse for the wear. One year, all my little sister wanted was a Cabbage Patch doll, and she soon discovered (by peeking through the ripped wrapping paper) that Grandma had made her one. But before Christmas morning, my parents and I substituted one of her old dolls, wrapped it up in Grandma’s paper with plenty of tape, and wrapped the Cabbage Patch in a different package. When my sister ripped into that paper, certain she knew what was inside, her jaw dropped (I know–it’s on videotape!). She didn’t say one word, just quietly put the old doll behind her and continued on. She WAS surprised when she finally opened the real Cabbage Patch! I don’t know whether she gave up on peeking at Christmas presents, but she sure knew we were on to her!

My mother has an amazing talent for disguising gifts. It is second only to her talent for hoarding old boxes in the basement. The year I brought my boyfriend (now husband) home for Christmas I unwrapped a package and found a box from Victoria’s Secret. I literally froze with anxiety about what on earth my mother was up to. I left the room to open the gift! I should have relaxed and remembered that this was my mom; there was a book inside. 10 years later, I STILL find a gift for me in that box each Christmas morning.

Mine was standing in line for an hour to have the kids pictures taken with the very expensive mall santa. After finally getting to the front my youngest turned to me and in her louded voice…..Mama look at the size of Santas balls…..there bigger than id ever see.

Of course they had giant christmas balls on the tree…but the whole crowd of course started to laugh..and santa laughed so hard he didnt charge us for the pictures. She is 14 and we still laugh about when she completmented santas balls

When we get together with my family we do stocking stuffers…we have about 8 of those super size stockings everyone has their name on them and we all fill them with the goodies. While all the adults were in the kitchen dining room fixing plates my son Braden who was 8 was in the living room when we all got back in their to do the gift giving there was a sticky note over each and every name and so all 8 stockings read Braden and he just had a big grin on his dimpled cheeks. When we took them off he said “I thought that might work”.

We’ve always tried to have a balanced outlook on the Christmas season with the kids. We teach them that Jesus is the reason for the season but we also talk about the legend of Santa Claus and how he embodies the spirit of giving. We had a couple story books that talked about how the legend started and how he was a real man once who lived and died.

I was patting myself on the back for how well rounded our kids were growing up when one night in December my youngest daughter who was about 5 at the time was sniffling in her bed. When I asked her what was wrong she said she was so sad that Santa had died. In her little mixed up mind he had just died–I think she was worried where her presents would be coming from. I quickly explained and all was made right.

It was sad but to this day I chuckle at the memory. Does that make me a terrible mom?

Lol…when i was 13, i was uber-excited about Christmas morning…my 3 siblings and I woke up at 4 am! I got 3 presents open…then I barfed everywhere. Luckily, I missed the presents. What can I say?!? I am an excitement barfer.

I think I was in my early teens when I had two pet lizards - the little ones that turn brown or green. They were named Camille and Leon (chameleon, get it)? We often put them out on the house plants for a while during the day. A few weeks before Christmas, Leon was not present on the house plant when we went to put them back. I was devastated that my lizard had run away, but honestly nobody else seemed to take it seriously and we figured he had gone down a vent into the furnace or something like that. Or maybe starved or froze - terrible thoughts! On Christmas, after we had opened all of the gifts, Leon came stomping out from under the tree skirt. I was thrilled, but it was also pretty funny to think he put himself under the tree.

My favorite “funny” memory, is that when I was around 9 or 10, I swore I heard Santa outside one Christmas Eve. I am the oldest of three and tried in vain to convince my younger siblings that I heard Santa. I think they thought that perhaps I made the story up or just plain didn’t believe me. In my heart though, I know I “heard ” Santa, I’m 48 now and I still hear the bells!

How about the Christmas my older son was 3, and when Christmas Eve arrived he started the morning with a giant tantrum, insisting it was NOT Christmas Eve! He cried and threw fits off and on all day, did not want to discuss Christmas, did not want to decorate the tree, etc. Finally through a cross-examination I discovered that he was terrified of Santa coming into the house. I assured him that we would leave a note so that Santa would not come in. You could see the relief on his face…then he crumpled up again sobbing that he wouldn’t get any presents. “Oh don’t worry,” I said briskly. “The UPS man will bring them instead.” And the next time he saw our friendly UPS man after Christmas? “THANK YOU FOR ALL MY PRESENTS!” UPS man a little confused, but he brings presents all the time, so he just said “You’re welcome, little man!”

My favorite Christmas memory is when my son was about 3. My Mom and Dad make early Christmas visits and this one they brought presents. Dad went around to the side where the chimney was and laid presents on the ground and in the bushes. He then came in and told my son that Santa’s bag must have ripped on his way out because presents had slid off of the roof. You have never seen a 3 year old get dressed so quickly and run screaming “Pwesents!!” so fast in your life I am pretty sure…It was good!!

My favorite is when my youngest was only about 4 and i was taking the them to get there picture with santa. Of course she couldnt hold back her excitement…as we got closer she commented on everything. Finally screaming outloud…MAMA LOOK AT THE SIZE OF SANTAS BALLS…complete silence..followed by tremendous laughing. She of course mean the bit balls that were on the christmas tree and laying around his chair.

Santa laughed…and the elf gave us our pictures for free. I of course was red the whole time…but its a memory we all laugh about now